What are we coming to?

10 years ago we united over tragedy. I was only a freshman in high school on 9/11, but I remember how connected everyone was that day. We stared at the television screens in every classroom -- most teachers gave up trying to teach. The screens were on in the cafeteria too. We cared desperately about what was going on in NYC and Washington and Pennsylvania. I remember the last time I saw the senior from my French class, who found out (during class) that her fiance was killed (she dropped out of school immediately after). I remember calling my mom at lunchtime (on my cell phone! I'd just gotten it for the start of school) to find out where my dad and uncle were, both travelling for business on the east coast.
Today, we're divided over idiocy... From Yahoo News, the brilliance that is America:

Even though we live in a supersized world, bigger is not always better. One
devoted White Castle customer is suing the restaurant chain because he can't fit
into the restaurant's booths. Martin Kessman, who weighs 290 pounds, complained
to management for more than two years after repeatedly knocking his knee into
the tables' metal supports. After the 64-year-old New York stockbroker sent a
series of letters of complaint to the chain, he received what he called
condescending responses. White Castle sent him free hamburger coupons and
promised that it would expand its booth sizes. But the booths were never changed
and Kessman is now taking his case to federal court. He is suing for bigger
chairs and unspecified damages because he says the eatery is violating the
Americans with Disabilities Act. (He compares himself to pregnant women and the
handicapped.) The lawsuit, however, has not put an end to Kessman's love of mini
burgers. Now, instead of going to White Castle himself, he sends his wife. (source
here)

I'm flabergasted. Seriously? I'm disgusted. Don't our federal courts have better things to do with their time? And our money?
I could go on a serious rant, but I think I'll restrain myself. But I do have a question to ask: I hear all the time, pray for America. I hear it on the radio, at church, in various groups I'm a part of. But what are we praying for? Is this... this mess... worth saving? <>

I received a fascinating email first thing this morning from the president of my alma matter. Although I am not Catholic, I am a proud graduate of a local Catholic university. I wanted to share this with you because it provided some fascinating food for thought.

Here's the situation:

The director of the Teacher's Education Program is a lesbian. It wasn't a surprise; she was director before Benedictine took over the local college (although the local college was Catholic as well -- Ursuline in fact). The university has a policy similar to the military's don't-ask-don't-tell: she was expected to endorse 1) General teaching best practices and 2) Catholic worldview while at work.

The dilemma arose when she and her partner went to Iowa over the summer and get married. Then, they came home and put a wedding announcement in several of the local papers. In the announcement, she stated her place of employment -- this Catholic university -- by name. As a result, this woman lost her job at the university, not for her sexual orientation but for defaming the university's religious reputation and not withholding her employment contract. She is currently procuring a lawyer to sue on discrimination charges.

All I know about the situation is from the newspapers and the President's letter. It appears that both parties did some things incorrectly; I don't want to discuss that. I also don't want to discuss whether homosexuality is right or wrong. What I do want to present to you is a few quotes from the President's letter about the concept of discrimination.

The following quotes are from the President's letter (link to the whole):

When an individual steps outside this teaching (about traditional marriage) and publicly announces that he/she is living a lifestyle in total opposition to what the Catholic Church and one of its universities hold dear, that decision represents a lifestyle choice that he/she is free to make. But if the person holds a position that represents the Catholic Church, there is conflict… For instance, if you wanted to be an officer of an environmental group that premised its mission on the reality of global warming, you would expect that your fellow members would hold you to advocating that doctrine and not give speeches claiming that the phenomenon is a chimera. If you came to believe differently, the responsible thing would be to leave the organization.

[When interviewing] I make a simple statement to the candidate, something to the effect: “XYZ is a Catholic and Benedictine university with a set of beliefs and traditions. No matter your religious background or affiliation, you are expected to respect and honor this tradition and set of beliefs. Can you accept that?”

If a person does not ascribe to the belief system held by the Church, a Catholic institution may not the be appropriate place for that individual to work. The blessing of America provides a patchwork of many kinds of institutions of higher learning. Where one’s belief system may put them outside the orbit of one institution, there is surely another to find a better fit.

So, what do you think? Did she face discrimination when she was fired? Or is it something else? Is the fault with her, either by misunderstanding or willfully breaking the assumptions of her employment? What are the rights of private -- especially private and religious -- institutions when it comes to social causes? What should they be?

PS: This is a complex situation -- just a loving reminder to choose your words carefully and politely! However, I would LOVE to hear views on all sides of this dilemma (Erika, this means you!)

What is this world coming to?

Just a quick note to post something that I wish you would join me in prayer over:

Evangelical Lutheran Church ordains 3 openly homosexual women

Whatever your opinion on homosexuality is in terms of people, just people, living lives out in the world, this is different. This is a church proclaiming to be evangelical... proclaiming to stand for and teach the word of God... disregarding it. Cherrypicking the love and grace, while ignoring the sin and justice. The Bible is a whole package and can't be broken down.

Just to shed a little light on my own beliefs, I believe that humans should be treated fairly under the governmental law, regardless of their religion or sexual orientation. No one, under the American constitution, should be in fear of bodily or economic harm based upon their beliefs. But that's the government. This is the church... as a private institution, their first call is to the Lord. The church has voluntary membership, voluntary leadership. The church has the right and responsibility to stand firm to their values -- the Bible, the Word of God. Or, stop pretending you value them.

2 Timothy 4:3 For the time will come when men will not put up with sound doctrine. Instead, to suit their own desires, they will gather around them a great number of teachers to say what their itching ears want to hear

Cultural Relevance, pt. 2

This week I'm exploring the idea of how Christians should relate to the rest of culture. Should we try and fit in? How relevant are we to be? In the first post, I discussed how Christians are to be different from the world. Now comes the other, harder part. I believe that we are not supposed to attempt to make the rest of the world look like us.

What exactly do I mean by that?

I feel that over the past several years (rather, centuries... pretty much since we got too big to be led by 11 men who physically knew Jesus), Christians have been making themselves a thorn in other's sides. We make a point of forcing others to live like us, using various methods, including but not limited to murder (the Inquisition), laws, and heckling (such as occurs outside of abortion clinics). By doing so, we are turning people further away from God and burning any bridges we may have had to reach them.

I have listened carefully over the years to the reasoning behind these actions. I have listened to pastors and laypeople, read articles and watched news clips. The justification I have repeatedly heard for this behavior boils down to one thing: sin. Homosexuality is a sin; abortion is a sin; being a (fill in the blank with whatever political party is opposite your own beliefs) is a sin. Since it is a sin, I must speak out against it.

I have an inquisitive mind and love an intellectual challenge, so I decided to do some research into this logic. I wanted to know: what does the Bible say about all this?

Here's what I saw by looking at Jesus' example:

1. Jesus is not easy on sin. When people were gathered inside the temple to do business, Christ "made a whip out of cords and drove them all from the temple area" (John 2:15). He is not afraid to speak out against the Pharisees and teachers of the law, rightly accusing them of sin (John 9:41). Jesus identifies sin for what it is.
2. Jesus is, however, forgiving. Look at the story in Luke 5:17-26, where he heals the man whose friends lowered him through the roof. "When Jesus saw their faith, he said, 'Friend, your sins are forgiven.'" Then he healed the man. Christ responds this way many times. "Your sins are forgiven." "Go and sin no more." Even on the cross: "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing" (Luke 23:34).

The lesson? Jesus knew what sin was and was bold enough to call it such. He was also quick to forgive that sin when people turned to Him. I think we can all agree on this much.

There's more to this story, however. Paul throws this doozy of a verse at us:

What business of mine is it to judge those outside the church? Are you not to
judge those inside? God will judge those outside. 1 Corinthians 5:12-13

Christ makes a distinction between those inside and outside of faith, too. His comment is a response to the disciples' questions about parables:

The secret of the kingdom of god has been given to you. But to those on the
outside everything is said in parables. Mark 4:11

Time for a culturally unacceptable word: double standard. In this case, it's a correct description of what Christ is perscribing. There is one moral standard for those inside the church and another for those outside. There is Christ and life for those inside, and death for those outside. God's always done this -- called a people out of the nations for himself. There have always been those who were called to a higher life and those left behind. First it was the Israelites. Now, it is the Christians.

Out of all nations you will be my treasured possession. Although the whole
earth is mine, you will be for me a kingdom of priests and a holy nation. Exodus
19:5-6

Like I voiced in my last post, Christians are supposed to be different. We are called to live a sinless life through Christ.

My biggest issue with the protestors, legislators, and other "thorny" people is that I believe they have too narrow a view of sin. Sin is doing things your way instead of God's way. "Everything that does not come from faith is sin" (Romans 14:23). Sure, homosexuality is a sin. So is pride... envy... lack of trust... and anger (which Christ likens to murder, Matt 5:21-22). And even though we are called to live a sinless life (Romans 6:2), not a one of us can (Romans 7:7-25).

Christ warns us against such behavior:

Do not judge, or you to will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own? Matt 7:1-3

Although I believe in confronting sin and calling it what it is, we have to follow Christ's model. Christ confronted those within the church with their sins. As to the rest of the world? Christ ministered to them when they came to Him, but he didn't go out and abuse them. That would be counter productive. Instead he acted with love and mercy, attracting others to Himself in a non-threatening way. When the opportunity arose, He spoke truth and allowed them to respond. Some followed, some didn't. Since Christ is our model, I firmly believe that we are to act the same way.

We know the Key to eternal life, and He wants us to tell others about Him. We aren't to abuse others about their sins... we need Christ. And until Christ comes and does what He's going to do, we cannot make the rest of the world look like us.

Cultural Relevance, pt. 1

I've been looking a lot lately at how Christians interact with the world, and I think overall, we've got it wrong. This is a hard realization for me, since I've grown up in a "normal" family, attending "normal" school and a "normal" church. It goes against what I've come to expect. The more I open my Bible, though, the more clearly I see these two facts, two sides of the same coin:

1. We aren't supposed to look like the rest of culture
2. We aren't supposed to make the rest of culture look like us

I'm going to break this up into 2 posts, one thinking about each truth.

I've seen so many churches in my local community lately trying to be "culturally relevant." They're using gimmicky catch phrases and entertainment value to get attention and theoretically, people through their doors on Sunday morning. I get the idea. "Let's be non-threatening and appealing to seekers." But is that really the point of church? Is that what Jesus did?

Here's some examples I've come across just this week:

• One church bought a closed-down movie theater to turn into their new "campus." Included will be a snack bar, a "worship auditorium," a children's movie theater, and laser tag.
• The street sign from a conservative church: "Harry isn't the original Potter -- God is."
• A sermon series called "We've Got an App for That," comparing the attributes of God to iPhone applications
• A sermon series called "God in HD (High Definition)," comparing God to TiVo, DVD players, 24 hour cable, and big screen TVs

Here's the problem: my God isn't like 24 hour cable. And I don't know about other families in other programing areas, but I don't particularly want Him to be. We canceled our cable.

I also believe that Jesus was terribly counter cultural. Look at how often he upset the Pharasees and teachers of the law! Jesus made a point of making culture uncomfortable:

Again the Jews picked up stones to stone hom, but Jesus said to them, "I have
shown you many great miracles from the Father. For which of these do you stone
me? John 10:31-32

The teachers of the law and the chief priests looked for a way to arrest him immediately, because they knew he had spoken this parable against them. Luke 20:19

So the Pharisees and teachers of the law asked Jesus, "Why don't your disciples live according to the tradition of the elders instead of eating their food with 'unclean' hands?" Jesus replied... Mark 7:5

Jesus pointed out the flaws in culture. He didn't embrace them. I do fully believe he was a happy man who had a lot of fun with his friends, but he didn't try to look like "the world" (those away from God). In fact, he said:

If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first. If you belonged to
the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you. John 15:18-19

Yes, Christ met people where they were and told parables relating to things his listeners would already understand (like seeds and shepherding). Here's where I see the difference tho: at that time, Christ was speaking to people outside the church. Evangelism needs to be culturally relevant. Churches are for worship and for training the believers in how to "go and make disciples of all nations" (Matthew 28:19). See that word "go"? It's a command. Jesus didn't say, "Make yourselves attractive so that others will come." He said "go."

I see this pattern in Acts, too. The believers come together to worship Christ, having "everything in common" (Acts 2:44). When Luke wrote the book of Acts, he made a clear distinction between the gathering of believers and the work of the Apostles, who spoke out in the name of Christ in public places to bring people into faith. Unbelivers were not the target audience of the church gatherings.

I think a church should be the most counter-cultural place you find in our modern world. It should be a place marked with selflessness and sharing, with praise and joy. The church should be:

• Peaceful (Peace I leave with you, my peace I give you. I do not give as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled. John 14:28-29)
• Loving (By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another. John 13:35)
• Carefully choosing to avoid sin (Be very careful, then, in how you live -- not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. Ephesians 5:15-16)
• Persecuted (Blessed are you when men hate you, when they exclude you and insult you and reject your name as evil because of the Son of Man. Luke 6:22)

It all boils down to this: We know the Key to eternal life, and He wants us to tell others about Him. We don't need gimmicks and tricks to entertain people... we need Christ. We need to look different than the world around us!

A Broader Sense of Freedom

I recently re-read a book I was first introduced to my senior year of high school in College Level English. I've read it three times already and probably will read it again. The book? The Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood.

Caveat: I'm not certain I like this book. It portrays the nation that once was America after a hostile takeover by a frighteningly conservative (but not religious) government. The birth rate has dropped so dramatically due to chemicals and stuff that now, intercourse is highly regulated by the government in the hopes of producing more children. This is definately not a book for young eyes, but I read it as a senior with guidance. I continue to read it not because I necessarily enjoy the plot. I read it because it makes me think.

[Caveat #2: The book has nothing to do with the movie that came out in '90. Don't watch it. It's horrid]

One of the primary themes in the book is the idea of freedom. Atwood crafts a world where freedom is celebrated -- but it isn't the freedom we're used to. In this new nation (called Gilead), citizens are gaurenteed the freedom FROM. (In contrast, Americans desire freedom TO) These two concepts exist on a metaphorical seesaw: If I want a freedom FROM, I have to give up a freedom TO. One of the examples in the book has to do with clothing choice. The women of Gilead are granted the freedom FROM ogling, sexual looks by giving up the freedom TO dress how they want. All the women wear blouses and long skirts. The Handmaids (one social class in the novel) even wear those big white nuns wimples from ages ago that have the wings on them so they have the freedom FROM awkward social interactions. They have the freedom FROM advertising and filth frequently in magazines... but they've given up their freedom TO read.

What an interesting concept. It really does make me look at this nation that we live in today. We focus on our freedoms TO do certain things: dress as we want, act as we want, worship as we want, live how we want. To keep everything in balance, we've given up one important thing: Our freedom FROM instructing others how to live their lives.

I may step on some toes here, and if I do, I apologize in advance. I've put a lot of thought into this over the past several years. I'd love to hear your thoughts, but please truly think them out and comment respectfully (not that I'd ever have to remind you lovely ladies of that!).

Here I go: If we want to maintain our freedoms to live, worship, and educate the way that we desire, we have to defend other's rights to do so as well, up to the point that it crosses Biblical lines. Take gun control. I may not like guns, and I may not want one in my own home, but I'm not going to tell you that you can't. There was an issue on my college campus attempting to get a particular club that supported a subculture kicked off campus. I stood up with the members of my religious organization to protect that club's right to be there even though I disagree with their message. We can't reach out to people we've chased away, and, on a deeper note... our group could have been the next to go. After all, a lot of time authentic Christianity spreads a message that is at least as controversial.

We don't have the right to litigate lifestyle. The government has their hands in so many social aspects far beyond the original "We the people" : to form a union of states, establish justice, ensure domestic safety, provide for the common defense, support general welfare (I believe the Founders meant this in a MUCH more compact manner than currently applies), and ensure the blessings of LIBERTY for following generations. I have no right to tell anyone that they must go to church, and they have no right to tell me I can't. I can't stop anyone from marching with PETA anymore than they can stop marchers with Right to Life. That's what liberty means.

In a world that treasures freedoms TO, groups promoting freedom FROM are going to have a struggle. Up to this point in my life and the entire foreseeable future, I have avoided this type of group. It isn't effective. I would much rather meet with someone of a different philosophy than my own and truly listen to what they have to say... then earn the right to peacefully and politely share my own thoughts. A back-and-forth, give-and-take, respect-based conversation rather than an argument of catchphrases thrown back and forth. It's a skill I have yet to perfect, but by the grace of God, in time, it's a skill I hope to grown in further.

I have so many other thoughts about this, but they're a horrid jumble right now. Perhaps some day... but in the mean time I leave you with one tidbit of food for thought:

"In the days of evil and anarchy you had freedom to, now you are granted freedom from. Don't underrate it." (Aunt Lydia, in the Handmaid's Retraining Center)

Modesty

Modesty has been on my mind a lot lately. Working in the schools, I see so many 12 and 13 year old girls (and 6 and 7 year old girls) wearing things that were designed for ages 20+ specifically to draw attention to certain aspects of their figure. I've also been increasingly troubled by the immodesty of some of the members at our church. While I believe firmly that men must take responsibility for their own lust issues, we are certainly not making it easy on them.

Mrs. Parunak over at Pursuing Titus 2 has written a beautiful blog entry that hits at the heart of this issue. I suggest you read it: The Top 10 Reasons Modesty Gets a Yawn. She regularly writes enlightening posts about modesty. While some of her ideas are still rolling around in my head for consideration, she writes eloquently and backs up her claims with research. Check it out!

The Peace Prize?

President Obama has been awarded the 2009 Nobel Peace Prize. I have little to say because I'm stunned. Stupefied. Whaaaaaaat?

You may read the article here, if you're interested.

After reading the article carefully, I've learned two very scary, very important facts that I'd like to share with you.

1. Good works are no longer necessary -- good intentions are enough.

"Rather than recognizing concrete achievement, the 2009 prize appeared intended to support initiatives that have yet to bear fruit: reducing the world stock of nuclear arms, easing American conflicts with Muslim nations and strengthening the U.S. role in combating climate change." (From the artcile, about half-way through)

As my husband said when I read this to him, "The road to **** is paved with good intentions..."

2. This is a blatant political "buy" to ensure Obama continues to support things the Prize committee and others choose for him, even if it isn't in the best interest of the country

"'We trust that this award will strengthen his commitment, as the leader of the most powerful nation in the world, to continue promoting peace and the eradication of poverty,' the foundation said." (From near the bottom)

So the Nobel Peace Prize goes to someone who has big ideas but no results, with the expectation that results must follow in the future... Where's the peace? Where's the honor in *not doing anything yet*? I'm confused and saddened for the memory of those who won this prize legitimately. It has just been cheapened.

An Acceptable Offering

I was reading a passage yesterday in my Bible that really struck my heart deeply. It led me to seek a clearer understanding of sacrifice, of what we should offer to God. I wanted to share it here. The background of the passage is that King David sinned by taking a census of the people during peacetime, so God punished Israel by sending a plague. The whole story can be found in 2 Samuel 24.

18 On that day Gad went to David and said to him, "Go up and build an altar to the LORD on the threshing floor of Araunah the Jebusite." 19 So David went up, as the LORD had commanded through Gad. 20 When Araunah looked and saw the king and his men coming toward him, he went out and bowed down before the king with his face to the ground.
21 Araunah said, "Why has my lord the king come to his servant?" "To buy your threshing floor," David answered, "so I can build an altar to the LORD, that the plague on the people may be stopped." 22 Araunah said to David, "Let my lord the king take whatever pleases him and offer it up. Here are oxen for the burnt offering, and here are threshing sledges and ox yokes for the wood. 23 O king, Araunah gives all this to the king." Araunah also said to him, "May the LORD your God accept you." 24 But the king replied to Araunah, "No, I insist on paying you for it. I will not sacrifice to the LORD my God burnt offerings that cost me nothing."

So often we give to the Lord out of our excess. We take care of our own needs and comforts first before seeing what we can spare for Christ. We pay the bills and write a check to the church for a reasonable amount of what's left... maybe $10 this month? Maybe $50? Maybe nothing? It depends on what's left over after everything else. This "me first" attitude is pervasive in our culture -- and persuasive, too.

It's also been a long problem.

All the way back in Genesis, Cain and Able make offerings to God (see the story in Genesis 4). One, Able, offers the choice piece of fat from his prized lambs -- the firstborn of his flock. His offering is accepted by God with pleasure. The other, Cain, brings "some" of the fruits of the soil. His offering is rejected. Now, I've never been to seminary or read a stack of commentaries, but I believe I can figure out why Cain's gift didn't make the cut. He responds by becoming "very angry, and his face was downcast" (v. 5). His attitude wasn't right; his heart wasn't in the gift. I always picture Cain as contemplating, "Now, if I do this for God, he'll do xxxx for me." His sacrifice didn't cost where it counts -- in the heart.

Selfish "gifts" were a problem in the New Testament, too. Ananias and his wife Saphirra try to lie about how much money they made for selling a piece of land so they could secretly withhold money for themselves (Acts 5). The Apostle Peter responds:

3Then Peter said, "Ananias, how is it that Satan has so filled your heart that you have lied to the Holy Spirit and have kept for yourself some of the money you received for the land? 4Didn't it belong to you before it was sold? And after it was sold, wasn't the money at your disposal? What made you think of doing such a thing? You have not lied to men but to God."

Once again, it's a heart problem. I don't see that the actual money is the problem. Rather, they make a show of giving a gift to the growing church while lying. They were not FORCED to sell the land. Again, I'm not a bible scholar, but I truly believe that if they had spoken truthfully that they wanted to keep some of the money for themselves, everything would have been fine. Because of their lies, they sacrifice their lives.

Through my study of these three passages, I believe that an acceptable offering needs three elements:

1. To be done in the right attitude -- praise and thankfulness (Genesis)
2. To be a true gift, not hiding an act of selfishness (Acts)
3. To truly be a sacrifice -- to cost something meaningful (2 Samuel)

I also firmly believe that, although these passages all deal with material wealth, the ideas about offering can and should be extended to all things we give to God, such as our time. We can't buy God's favor and we can't trick Him. Rather, we should pour our hearts out to Him and offer our best -- the first of our money, the freshest of our time, all of our worship. I don't usually use The Message Bible paraphrase, but I love the way it states 2 Samuel 24:24 --

I'm not going to offer God, my God, sacrifices that are no sacrifice.

A sense of what we've lost

Although I haven’t had a chance to go out to New Salem for a few weeks, I’ve been thinking a lot about what’s different between the 1830’s and now. Sure, all the modern conveniences have been invented now – central air, refrigeration, the internet. But I know in my heart that that is only the surface. There has been a critical shift in the way people live, and the more I think about it the sadder I become.

This critical shift is in community. People used to not only know their neighbors; they relied on them day-in and day-out. I’ve been reading a book that is an autobiography of a woman who came to the frontier of Illinois with her land-surveying husband right after their wedding. It is called A Woman’s Story of Pioneer Illinois, written by Christiana Holmes Tillson. She encountered a land that was wild and untamed. She discusses a lot about how women supported each other, how they taught each other the things they needed to know. She talked about how she was working in the kitchen until only a few hours before her first child was born, as her husband had invited company over. She was down for a few days, but then went right back to work. The only way this was possible was with the support of her good friend who lived on the next homestead over – and she returned the favor a few years later when her friend delivered.

Reading this book, I couldn’t help but reflect on my own modern American life. Many days go by where I only interact with my husband or the families I work for. I live in a building with seven other families, and I only actually know one of them and can recognize three others by sight, but not name. I’ve talked to some of my friends about this – we’re all part of the Facebook generation – about how we’re closer than we’ve ever been in history, and yet farther away at the same time. Our culture has traded quality friendships for quantity acquaintances.

I don’t have a solution to propose; I think awareness is the only step at this point. All the 12-step programs preach that admitting you have a problem is the first part of healing from it. We, as a culture, have a problem. People are drowning in loneliness in the most connected generation ever to walk this planet. Waking up to this fact is the beginning of the process of correction.

Saturday Morning Fun

I woke up Saturday morning with a bug to go yard sale shopping. I've never been much of a yard saler, but I was desperately in need of some more pots to put my plants in (it's amazing how big little tiny seeds can grow, I wasn't properly prepared). I also wanted some paintings if I could find them cheap because I live in a white apartment and am so bored of white walls.

So, with coffee in hand, my dear husband humored me by getting up early and setting out to peruse the near-by neighborhoods. It was May 2nd, a beautiful sunny Saturday that defines everything I love about spring. I was certain we'd find a yard sale on every block.

Except, we didn't. I'm not sure if it was the neighborhoods we chose or what, but I didn't find a single yard sale anywhere in town! We drove through several different neighborhoods without any luck. Then, right before we gave up and went home, a little sign caught my eye: "Public Auction Today." Shaune turned to me in excitement and said, "Let's Go!"

We got there a little bit before they started, so we got to wander around and see everything that would be up for sale. An older lady had passed away, and her family was clearing out her house. Some of the family members were around helping set up. I saw so much that I would love to own! So I registered for my number, sent my husband on to his meeting, and waited for the excitement.

The sale was one of the most exciting things I've ever been a part of. I've never been to one before. It was so hard to not stick my number up for every item -- but I guess that's exactly what the auctioner wants. I got some great bargains on the things I needed and then some: $22 got me about 20 flower pots, three paintings, two boxes of cooking and sewing books, a couple of decorative plates, and two little figurines for my mother-in-law's Mother's Day present. I've still only sorted through half of the books but the ones I've already seen are excellent! A Vogue book on fit and alterations, cookbooks from the 50's on how to be hospitiable on a budget (!), even one on inexpensive flower aranging to decorate the house. All my plants have new homes and I have pots left just in case I want more. All for $22...

About half-way through the auction, tho, I was hit by extreme sadness. Someone had spent years gathering all these mementos, books, craft projects, furniture, everything that was laid out for sale. And yet, when she died, it was left behind to be picked up for pennies by strangers. She had a lot of half-started craft projects that no one wanted -- the auctioner threw something like 5 boxes together as a single lot that sold for $3. I felt like crying. This auction made clear for me something I've read before but never internalized:

Matthew 6:19"Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal."

Luke 12:16-20 "The ground of a certain rich man produced a good crop. 17He thought to himself, 'What shall I do? I have no place to store my crops.'
18"Then he said, 'This is what I'll do. I will tear down my barns and build bigger ones, and there I will store all my grain and my goods. 19And I'll say to myself, "You have plenty of good things laid up for many years. Take life easy; eat, drink and be merry." '
20"But God said to him, 'You fool! This very night your life will be demanded from you. Then who will get what you have prepared for yourself?'"

This auction set these verses firmly in my heart. They have become real to me in ways I haven't experienced before. It's not that we shouldn't have things in this life, but we shouldn't put our heart in them. Because, after we die, they could be sold for pennies or even thrown away. Material things have no eternal value whatsoever. So, let me encourage you to:

Store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. (Matthew 6:20)

Chicago Maraton 2009

This decision has been weighing on my heart for a few weeks. I still think I'm crazy. It's not a normal every day thing to just... just what? Run 26+ miles at one time on a fall day in October!

The motivation for this most certainly doesn't come from me. My husband and I were sitting in church last weekend when the pastor invited us to join him in his mission. Our conference has been partnered with a region in Liberia, Africa for several years. We are running to raise awareness of the conditions there and well as any sponsorship money we can. I'd like to devote this post to introducing you to the situation in Liberia and our race to change it. Information is drawn from the CIA Factbook, Wikipedia, and personal knowledge from church.

Liberia is considered by many to be the poorest country in the world. Their per-capita GDP is only estimated at $500 (2008 statistic, PPP). Liberia was settled by freed slaves fleeing America in the mid-1800s. For most of its existence, it has been poor, but modernizing efforts took place in the mid-1900s. A coup in 1980 disrupted that modernization as a vicious dictator took office. A formal civil war was declared in 1989. From then until 2003, the nation fought against itself. Hundreds of thousands of people were killed -- especially children and the educated. Businesses fled and infrastructure was completely destroyed.

Since 2003, the nation has stabilized, but it is so devastated. An entire generation of children is growing up without parents and without education. This is the root of my cause. Over the past 3 years, the Methodist church of Illinois has partnered with the Methodist church of Liberia to impact the children. We have worked to build churches, wells for clean water, and schools, as well as provide uniforms and scholarships so students can attend the schools. In 2004, only 65% of elementary age students and 24% of secondary age students attended any school.

Our team is running to build a high school -- the first in the Kokoya District. The John Wesley School there currently goes through 8th grade but needs a new building and well to enlarge and include the upper grades. Education is near-and-dear to my heart, so when Pastor announced that this is what the team was running for, my husband and I signed up.

I'll have more information in the coming weeks about the project. A man on the team is currently working to build a website with more information, pictures, and videos from Liberia (we have close contacts, Pastor just got back from Liberia in January and we've met several of the Liberians here in Springfield). I've never run before, so this is certain to be an adventure.

Be in prayer! May God do big things!

Springtime... and Busyness!

I've not hardly used the computer in over a week! Part of that has been forgetfulness (it's so easy to sit on the porch with a novel and a cup of tea when it's 75 and lovely), part of that has been busyness that has taken over my life. I'm 6 weeks from finishing classes! I can't wait. This is the last term of text books, lectures, tests, etc. Next term I will be a supervised teacher -- after that, a liscensed one! I will have achieved my goal, honored my parents, and be free to move on with my life.

Busyness has a certain joy.I love to have tasks in front of me. I've started my little garden on the porch. I've completed a painting and a dress; met family commitments; completed homework I'd been putting off; even had a "Date Night" with my husband when a dear friend passed along two tickets to the Broadway musical "Hairspray" that she and her husband were unable to use. I feel like I have a purpose when I am busy.

At the same time, important things that can only accompany an idle schedule have slipped away. I've found my prayer time becoming shorter and shorter, while my task list rumbles away in my head. My "still time" with my husband, where there is nothing to do and no desire to do anything other than sit on the couch and gab has vanished. Productivity has taken the place of peace.

I've been reminding myself to pause and reflect on these early days of springtime. There will only be one March 18th this year -- only one Wednesday in mid-March when the sun rose just as I was kissing my husband good-bye for work, when I was able to have a leisurely breakfast in the sunlight, when no pressing demands need my attention until noon. I encourage each of you to take even just a minute today to appreciate what a gift today is!

Prayers, please

I'm not sure how many of you freqent the news, but this morning a pastor was shot while preaching. He was killed, and two of the congregants were injured. I have 2 specific prayers about this tragedy , as I'm shaking and confused and worried.

1. The entire situation is scary and tragic. Please pray for the witnesses, the victims, the families, as well as the families of the killer. Just the whole situation. Lives have been changed today.

2. This church is in my home community -- less than a mile from where I grew up. I have several friends in the congregation. As much as this hurts on a general scale, my heart is breaking at a local scale as well. I know God's in control, but...

Thanks, to any who are willing to pray. I know that the Father has already won the battle, but the road until He returns is likely to be covered with more pain like this.

Edited to add: I just found out that I know the shooter, as well. His family is members at my church. Please pray.

Thoughts on Feminine Dress

I wanted to share some of the thoughts I had last week, the Week in Feminine Dress. For some of you this may have seemed like no big deal. You may already wear dresses and skirts frequently, if not every single day. My experience has been quite different than that. This week has been an important and exterior step to show what God has been doing in my heart these past three years.

I started college in Fall 2005 with big plans. I was going to graduate as a double major in International Economics and Econometrics from a prestigious business school in only 3.5 years. Then, gloriously single, I was going to fly off to France to live a crazy ex-pat life in Paris until I got bored with it all at which time I’d return to some major US city, find some nice boy, and settle down. Although I was a Christian, I hadn’t submitted my life to Christ in any realistic way. By the end of my first semester, I was miserable and planning other options for school.

To summarize the next two years in extremely brief fashion: I transferred to a school near my parent’s home, got involved with a wonderful campus ministry, renewed my commitment to Christ, met my now husband, got involved in evangelism projects I never would have imagined, got married, moved and switched schools again, and joined another new church. That brings us up to Christmas Break 2008.

At the end of last semester, God showed me that I wasn’t living modestly. I love to get attention and compliments. My biggest concern as I go about my day is “what will people think of me?” My cowardice to step outside the status quo has held me back from witnessing to and serving the people in my life. Although this is mostly a heart issue, my clothing has certainly been a component. While I crave attention for looking like I “should,” I dread the attention that comes from being different.

I decided to do WIFD even though I was scared (of skirts? Yes…). I wore my favorite dress, which before now has only been worn at home. I wore skirts that I’ve only worn to formal events. And I relaxed! The adults I interact with didn’t say anything about my different wardrobe, if they even noticed. The children in my first grade class kept telling me they loved my dress with cherries on it – “You look like a real teacher, Mrs. Preston!” (I love kids, lol). And God nurtured my heart to realize that my preoccupation with appearance has held me back all these years.

Since WIFD, I’ve gone back to wearing pants more often than not. But I can feel a shift in my heart. I’m wearing them because that’s what I happen to have in my closet at the moment, not because it is what is expected of me. To sum it up – I care less! It’s a freeing feeling.
God still has a lot of work to do in my heart to knock down my pride and obsession with fitting in. But I can clearly see that the Week in Feminine Dress has helped me in my journey towards not only a modest appearance, but also a modest heart.

The cold days of winter

Today is nearly the last day of winter break. On Tuesday morning, I have to resume my place in the drudgery that is the American education system. These 6 weeks at home, learning about myself as a wife and a homemaker, have been heavenly. I feel like I've accomplished so much! I never realized that being home alone all day could be so fulfilling. As sad as I am to go back to school, I take joy in the fact that I have only 6 more classes, then 15 weeks of student teaching before I graduate with my Bachelor's in Elementary Education. Although it's hard to be motivated now, my husband and I have talked repeatedly about the benefits it will bring to our future family, especially if we move to a state that is not homeschool-friendly.

Here's what I've completed during my brief stay at home:

1. Sewing my Regency Christmas dress, start to finish.
2. Crocheting a little stuffed mousey for a friend's baby (see the adorable pattern here)
   
3. Reorganizing the study/spare bedroom
4. Sewing new flannel pajamas for myself and my husband
5. Decorating for Christmas and hosting a Christmas party
   
6. Reading several good books
   
7. Canceling cable television (we decided, after much discussion, that it wasn't worth the cost and was only bringing filth into our home) and reworking our budget to increase giving
8. Baking many tasties in the kitchen
   
9. Going on a wonderful honeymoon to celebrate my marriage with my soul mate

and...

1. Quite possibly started on the road to mommy-hood! Although we're still waiting for a positive test, my body is telling me that I am carrying treasure. No period, sleeping 12-15 hours a day, constant nausea, coupled with bloating that makes even my most comfortable clothing a little uncomfortable is cluing me in to the idea that maybe I'm in the small percentage of women who don't get enough hormone in their waste to ever get a positive test. I plan to call a doctor and ask for a blood test next week, if nothing changes.

It wasn't until this break that I realized how much SAHMs or SAHWs actually get done. I've been in the public school system from preschool through college (the end is near...) and have constantly been told that a woman without a job is worthless, especially if she doesn't have children. This teaching has always conflicted with the tug in my heart towards home, which has only gotten stronger as I've grown in my faith. When I worked in a daycare center, my heart would break every day as mothers and children would tearfully say good-bye. Certainly leaving a piece of yourself behind so you can "work" isn't natural!

My husband and I decided even before the wedding that I would stay home once we had little ones, but my mind was still filled with lingering doubts about my ability to do that well. It wasn't until just a few days ago that I found peace with making my own schedule and finding contentment in my own explorations and projects rather than those assigned to me by professors. Home certainly offers a different kind of life, but has it's own peaceful, sustaining rhythm. Home is where I'm called to be. I am counting down the days until I can be home for good.

Honeymoon!

Tomorrow, at 5:00:00pm, my beloved and I leave on our honeymoon! We were married 4 1/2 months ago, on August 2nd, but were unable to take a trip at that time because my college classes resumed almost immediately after the wedding. That, and our wedding was originally scheduled for December 20th and we'd already booked the cabin. We moved the date up for a wide variety of reasons, and I am SO glad we did.

Why, in this culture, the first thing people assume with young marriage is that the girl is already pregnant? This belief is especially prevalent in the university culture I've been a part of for the last four years (the end is near...). It seems like the only reason people in the "intelligent" community marry is because of an "accident." I hate this mindset with a passion and am doing everything I know how to change it. Some of us marry because we love each other and God has placed us in each other's life with enough stability that staying apart only creates unnecessary tension. You don't have to be 30 to be "grown up."

Well... back to the honeymoon. We had planned on skiing but the weather doesn't look like it will cooperate. So we're packing up the guitar, hymn books, board games, sewing, and more to snuggle up in front of the cabin's fire place -- a luxury we don't have in our little apartment. And once we get back, every penny goes in the piggy so we can buy a house before we have too many littles running around.

See you after the first -- 2009!